Why Does My Child Have to Give Valentines to All the Classmates? (2024)

It's that time of year again! Valentine's Day is fast approaching and you've opened up your child's backpack to find the dreaded class list and directive to make sure everybody gets a card. If you're like many parents, you're groaning and wondering why your child has to give a Valentine's Day card to everyone. Here's the answer to that question and five more common questions about Valentine's Day at school.

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Children Giving Valentine's Day Cards to Everyone in the Class

It may seem as though it's going overboard to give cards to the entire class and your child may even complain about giving cards to kids he doesn't like, but the reasoning is simple enough. Giving cards to everyone is the best way to avoid hurt feelings. If your child expresses concern about giving cards to everyone, don't dismiss his concerns, but do make sure he understands that it's not negotiable.

You can encourage him to write a special message on the cards to his best friends as a way to set those apart from the rest.

If You Can't Afford to Buy Valentine's Cards

Talk to your child's teacher, preferably before you mention it to your child. Most teachers will have a creative solution to this problem. In my years of teaching, I always had parents who sent in their children's leftover cards "just in case."Many teachers are bargain shoppers and pick up boxes of Valentine's Day cards on clearance every year to stow away for just such situations. Or your child's teacher may be able to send home the materials to create homemade cards. Another option is to print Valentine's Day cards from online resources.

Does My Child Have to Address and Sign All the Cards Himself?

This really depends on how old your child is and whether or not his fine motor skills are up to it. By the time children reach late elementary school (3rd, 4th, and 5th grade), they should not only be able to address and sign Valentine's Day cards but also keep track of the class list to make sure everybody has a card.

In kindergarten, your child may be able to sign his own name to the cards and trace over his classmate's names if you pencil them on first. First and second graders are most likely able to address and sign all the cards but may need to do them in batches over the course of a few days.

Why Doesn't My Child's School Allow Valentine's Day Celebrations?

There's no one reason that schools don't allow Valentine's Day celebrations, but there are a few common themes, including the concern of the impactValentine's parties and candy can have on children with food allergies. Other issues may be:

(1) Parties and cards exchanges can be disruptive to the learning process. It's very hard to get anything accomplished if students are anticipating a celebration or recovering from one.

(2) Not all students' religious beliefs include Valentine's Day and celebrating it in the classroom can be considered discriminatory.

(3) Valentine's Day is perfect fodder for bullying, clique behavior and hurt feelings, even if the "everyone gets a card" rule is enforced. Instead of providing the opportunity to send cards with nasty messages or to make fun of certain types of cards, some schools ask that Valentine's Day celebrations and exchanges take place off school grounds.

What Should My Child Do for the Teacher on Valentine's Day?

Take your cues from your child. Ask him: "What do you want to do for your teacher on Valentine's Day?" If all he wants to do is give her the same type of card he's giving all his classmates, that's fine. If he wants to do something more extensive, that's fine too. Teachers don't (or shouldn't) expect their students to give elaborate gifts. After all, Valentine's Day is traditionally more about love than appreciation!

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Heart-Healthy Valentine's Day Party and Food

Since February is alsoAmerican Heart Month, many classrooms are having healthier celebrations. Instead of cookies, cupcakes, and punch, parents can send in more creative Valentine's Day treats.

Some of the more interesting ideas I've seen include: watermelon slices cut with heart-shaped cookie cutters; strawberries cut in half (they look like hearts); bagels with cream cheese mixed with a few drops of red food coloring; heart-shaped mini-muffins and melon cut into the shape of flowers.

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Why Does My Child Have to Give Valentines to All the Classmates? (2024)

FAQs

Why Does My Child Have to Give Valentines to All the Classmates? ›

It may seem as though it's going overboard to give cards to the entire class and your child may even complain about giving cards to kids he doesn't like, but the reasoning is simple enough. Giving cards to everyone is the best way to avoid hurt feelings.

Do kids still give valentines at school? ›

Should Your Child Give Every Student a Card? Most teachers and etiquette experts we spoke with indicated that it is usually recommended to give every student in the classroom a valentine, especially if your child is passing them out at school.

Why should we not celebrate Valentine's Day in school? ›

Valentine's Day has been considered a bad influence on children so most schools do not allow children to celebrate this day with their friends and teachers. This day is considered a distraction from learning according to school authorities and parents which will leave a negative impact on children.

How do kids celebrate valentines in school? ›

Classroom exchange: Have each student bring in a pre-made Valentine card for every student in the class. This allows every student to receive a card and participate in the holiday. Secret Valentine: Have each student bring in a pre-made Valentine card for a secret Valentine.

Are you supposed to get your kids valentines gifts? ›

Yes, giving your child a Valentine's Day card or treat is a lovely thing to do. Those who include their children in Valentine's Day tend to go all out on presents and special meals and messages of caring and kindness. "We have little presents and special dinner," says Stephanie M. "My little boy calls it Love Day."

Do kids give parents valentines? ›

To many, Valentine's Day is no longer about celebrating your significant other – if you have one – but your relationship with just about anyone, whether platonic or familial. In some families, it's now standard procedure to exchange Valentine's Day cards between parents and children.

Should you celebrate Valentine's Day with your kids? ›

In fact, celebrating Valentine's Day with your children can be a wonderful opportunity to teach them about the importance of love and affection in relationships.

Why is Valentine's Day important for students? ›

Regardless of age, Valentine's Day is an opportunity to teach children about love. Love comes in many shapes and sizes. It is a complicated topic that is hard enough for adults to understand. However, there are a few ideas about love that many can agree on.

Is it OK not to do Valentine's Day? ›

“Ultimately, V-Day is often a day to express love and affection toward your partner, so for those who have personal reasons for not wanting to celebrate, I encourage them just to see it as another day to express love for the person(s) in their life who deserve their flowers 365 days of the year.” So even if one half of ...

Why is Valentine's Day banned in some countries? ›

In many nations, individuals commemorate this occasion by gifting chocolate, flowers, and cards to their loved ones. However, a few countries prohibit the observance of Valentine's Day since it is not part of their religion.

Do middle schoolers give valentines? ›

Sure, middle schoolers sort of “date” and the school markets Valentine's Grams. There are a few gifts given, yet they are mostly for friends, nothing more. “It's kinda fun to be with my friends because I don't have a valentine,” said 7th grader Cailani D.

What is code Valentine at school? ›

The “Code Valentine” signal will be made anytime a person on campus is in need of emergency services such as cardiac arrest or symptoms where the Code Valentine/First Responder Team may be needed. Teachers serving on the Code Valentine Team should include members of the First Responder Team.

Do dads buy daughters valentines? ›

Many dads do use Valentine's Day to express love for their daughters as well.

Do dads buy daughters valentines cards? ›

I believe that every daughter deserves a Valentine's Day gift from her dad! It's a great way to show your daughter how much you love her and appreciate her. I know that my dad always made sure to get me a small gift or card on Valentine's Day, and it meant the world to me.

Are girls supposed to get a boy something for valentine's Day? ›

It is common for both men and women to give gifts to their partners on Valentine's Day. It is not limited to a specific gender, both men and women can give gifts to their partners as a way to show their love and affection.

Do 4th graders do Valentine's Day? ›

Most of my fourth graders do, some choose not to. I don't tell them they have to but I do say if they are bringing cards they bring one for everyone.

Do fifth graders exchange valentines? ›

This really depends on how old your child is and whether or not his fine motor skills are up to it. By the time children reach late elementary school (3rd, 4th, and 5th grade), they should not only be able to address and sign Valentine's Day cards but also keep track of the class list to make sure everybody has a card.

Is Valentine's Day for kids or adults? ›

Regardless of age, Valentine's Day is an opportunity to teach children about love. Love comes in many shapes and sizes. It is a complicated topic that is hard enough for adults to understand. However, there are a few ideas about love that many can agree on.

What is Valentine's Day for students? ›

Valentine's Day is a holiday that people celebrate on February 14. It is also called Saint Valentine's Day. On Valentine's Day people greet loved ones, close friends, family members, and classmates by sending them cards called valentines. People also give candy, flowers, and other gifts to loved ones.

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